


Our secret till the grave

by xyzhdl



Category: Vikings (TV)
Genre: Affairs, Canon Compliant, F/M, Fatherhood, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Love Triangles, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 08:34:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28579068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xyzhdl/pseuds/xyzhdl
Summary: What happend was a heated night full of passionated lust that lead to this fatale moment they found themselves in now.
Relationships: Hvitserk/Katya (Vikings), Ivar/Katya (Vikings)
Comments: 13
Kudos: 15





	1. The Aftermath

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, I don't even know what this is but I hope you enjoy it.  
> Got inspiration from amyponders fanfiction about hvitserk and Ivar's Love triangle called "Spoil me rotten" which I definitely recommend to you.  
> Now, have fun reading it

"I’m with child, and you are the father. “  
Hvitserk eyes literally flew to her belly and to her face, Princess Katya’s Face.  


He didn’t know how it happened but several weeks ago, just days after his brother Ivar told him, that Katya had visited him, in disguise of Freydis, he was summoned to the Princesses bedchamber.  


What happened there was a heated night full of passionate lust that led to this fatale moment they found themselves in now.  


"A-Are you sure, it could also be Ivar’s child“ he whispered and hooked her eyes with his, her blue eyes full with fresh tears just waiting to be shed.  


„No, Ivar is…“ he could see how her mind tried to search for the right words to end her phrase which he knew would determine his fate.  


She cleared her throat slightly „…can’t be the father, he didn’t cum in me" she stated silently, her eyes fixed on his face, a silent plead in them, and a light blush across her face.  


Hvitserk groaned slightly and drew his hands across his face, before he stood up from his place and made his way over to her.  
She was fidgeting her fingers and seemed to be greatly nervous maybe even afraid of him.

When he stood before her he took her hands to his side and drew her in for a hug while caressing her back for comfort.  
She was surprised and a little stiff but soon relaxed and he felt her cold tears dripping on his shoulder and his neck, he didn't care.  


He took her face and kissed her forehead gently. /> She breathed deeply and smiled a reassuring smile and he knows everything will work out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you liked it leave a positive comment or a kudos.  
> Remember english isn't my native language so forgive some tipos.  
> See you next time  
> Maria :)


	2. Celebration, Snow and Tears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hvitserk and Katya discuss the future of their baby

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey,  
> This is the 2nd Chapter of my Story, hope you all will like it :)  
> FYI: The Scene takes place in episode 15 from season 6b at the celebration after Olegs Death.

The Celebration of King Oleg’s Death were in full swing, also celebrating Prince Igor’s win over his barbaric Uncle.

In this room full of vibrant cheerfulness, everyone except two people, were at ease.  
Hvitserk roamed his tired eyes over the partying people and brought his, not so alcoholic, drink to his lips.  
His green eyes caught the blue Eyes of Katya and he could sense that she was nervous.  
He brought himself to smile at her, the same reassuring smile she smiled, but after all his smile did not reach his eyes.

Hvitserk’s Mind wandered, to the night a week ago.  
The night she told him she was pregnant with his child, a child that should not exist and would bring death to both should the real paternity come to light.  
After both had soothed out their emotional roller coaster of emotions they had decided to sit down, to talk about the future of their baby.

“Ivar can never know that the child is not his, Hvitserk it would kill him” she said to him, her voice full of sadness.  
“And both of us first” he chuckled darkly knowing full well, that his brother would not hesitate to finally fulfill his promise to kill him, if he ever came to know of the betrayal they had made.

He looked up at Katya his eyes slowly filling with tears, tears for his Child, a bastard, one that would grow up fatherless, because his parents had made a terrible mistake.  
His hands began to tremble, and tears started to fall out of his eyes, his sobs were loud and erratic.

Instantly, Katya kneeled before him, his face in her gentle hands and feathery touches on his cheeks, which he identified as her lips, kissing away his tears.  
“Hvitserk don’t cry, everything will solve out, I promise you!” she begged him, her voice sounded tearful as well, and suddenly her lips touched his.  
Looking back, he knew that she just did this to calm him down, but he still could feel her lips on his in this stuffy room full of people.  
She was now standing with Ivar, the father, of his child and talked to him.  
He didn’t know what she wanted to tell him but when he could see how Ivar’s eyes grew big, he knew what just had happened. She had told him that he was going to be a father, a father to a child which wasn’t his own, again.  
A single mourning tear rolled down Hvitserks cheek, he allowed it to happen.

He excused himself shortly after Dirs cheerful invitation to drink and now stood outside of the huge castle, looking in the sky with snowflakes falling softly, in his hair and beard.

“He didn’t say anything to me about the child, and he doesn’t want to stay here, I know that as well as he does himself.” a soft voice brought him back and a soft shiver ran down his spine because of the cold.

He turned to his left and saw Katya standing there, eyes on him and a soft smile on her lips.  
This time Hvitserks smile did met his eyes and he drew her in for a long hug, kissing her hair lightly.  
“Everything will work out” he mumbled in her hair and this time he knew it would.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What will happen next??
> 
> I'm really hoping you liked this chapter.  
> See you next time  
> Maria :)


	3. Goodbyes don't need to be sad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is the end.  
> Even though I think I should add an epilogue, maybe :)  
> What do you think of this ending?
> 
> Hope you will like it.  
> Maria :)

It happened at Oleg’s Funeral.  
“Do you want to stay here, in Kiev?”  
He knew it would come and it still caught him off guard.  
Do you?” Hvitserk questioned back because he already knew he couldn’t stay even if it broke his heart  
And hearing Ivar say “No” relieved him but also broke his already splitting heart in thousand pieces. 

“Katya is carrying my Child.” Ivar suddenly said and Hvitserk could feel his pulse racing.  
“Your child?” He said and tried to sound surprised but failed miserably.  
“My child” Ivar answered, and he emphasized the “my” roughly making Hvitserk jump internally.  
If Ivar noticed, he didn’t let it near him. 

The night after the funeral, Hvitserk found himself outside of Katya’s Chamber. 

She had followed him after the funeral and had caught him alone in one of the castles hallways. 

“I would like to invite you to my Chamber tonight, Hvitserk” she had whispered in a hushed tone and before he could protest and ask why she would invite him and not Ivar into her bed she was gone.  
So now he found himself outside of the Princesses sleep chamber and was debating whether he should really do this or not.  
Finally, he knocked uncertain and was surprised to see that she opened the door like she had waited behind it for him. 

Two steps inside her bedroom her lips were on his. 

Hvitserk was stunned, he wasn’t dumb, he had known why the princess demanded his presence, but still, her enthusiasm caught him off guard.  
He pushed her away from him, forehead pressed against her, both breathing heavily.  
“Why are you doing this Katya? Shouldn’t you spend this last night with Ivar?” he mumbled against her lips. 

She sighed, pushed his arms away and walked to the middle of her room, chewing on her bottom lip.  
“I don’t want Ivar here tonight; he mistakes me for someone I’m not and it hurts to know that I will never be sufficient.”  
"He tells me that he loves me, but we both know, that it's not the truth and that I will disappoint him someday." Katya angrily wiped the tears from her face and stepped closer to Hvitserk. "But with you..." she whispered, the sentence left unanswered, her cheeks stained from fresh tears and her brown eyes full of hurt, guilt and something he couldn’t name.  


Hvitserk felt his heart clenched at the wrecked sight of the beautiful princess, the future mother of his child.  
“but with me…” he tried to finish her sentence; her cold trembling hands tucked in his big warm ones, comforting her like she had comforted him back then.

“I can feel like I am me Hvitserk, you don’t give me the feeling of being someone else, you don't treat me like a ghost and your presence is good for me, you're healing me.” 

Instead of saying something else he slowly lowered his lips against hers.  
Their lips and tongues danced together slow and sensual, like lovers who wanted to savor every last moment of their feelings for each other. 

As they laid together, his head on her belly and her hands fondling his braids a question occurred him.  
“Do you think we will see each other again?”  
Her hand in his hair stopped and she inhaled deep before answering.  
“If god wants it, it will happen, you just have to believe.” He couldn’t see signs of tears in her eyes, but he could sense she was sad, so he plastered a short kiss on her still flat belly and soon they were both sleeping fondly, intertwined with each other.

“I really wish you could see your child grow up, Hvitserk. I’m sorry” were the last words she said to him when he rose in the early dawn about to return to his chamber.  
Hvitserk knew this moment would come and his heart sank, and no answer fell from his lips.  
Instead, he kissed her one last time, muttered a subtle “Goodbye Katya” against her lips and went to his own chamber.

Now, sitting on his horse waiting for Ivar to finish his goodbye speech with Katya, Hvitserk had to contemplate his own feelings for the Princess. 

Yes, they were lovers, had a passionate affair, he was the father of her child, but definitely not a suitable couple.  
Nevertheless, he could still feel her lips on his, her skin on his skin, her delicate body in his hands and still hear the sweet sounds of pleasure fall from her lips.  
He could still hear her words to him about how he made her feel like a real person not a ghost to a guilty person. 

Deep in his thoughts, Hvitserk flinched imperceptibly when he heard Ivar footsteps approaching.  
Katya had her eyes on them, her posture was confident, and she smiled a smile to them.  
Lastly her eyes set on him and a sad smile crossed her features so fast he almost missed it.  
But he saw it and was remined that that was probably the last time he would see her and his child.  
Although his thoughts were quite dark, he smiled a sincere smile at her, reassuring her everything was alright.

Riding out of Kiev and in the woods felt like freedom to Hvitserk and his heart finally felt at ease, no worries just the concept that every person was where he or she should be and it would work out.

And in the end, Hvitserk believed deeply in it.


	4. Reunions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hvitserk returns to Kiev with Alfred for Igor's coronation and meets someone from his past

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Actually I wanted to finish it with this epilogue but the ideas just kept flooding so expect a new chapter soon. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this one and see you next time,  
> Maria :)

6 years, 6 years had gone by since Ivar had died on the battlefield. 

Hvitserk, now Athelstan, could remember this day crystal clear, he died a hero and would feast with his parents and the gods in Valhalla.  
Hvitserk didn’t believe that anymore, and everyone who had asked “why?” had always heard the same answer.  
“I was lost, and he saved me.”  
And it was true, he was lost and frustrated after the battle, where his fate and gods had led him, but his baptism had given him a direction, had lulled him from the cold streets into the warm, welcoming house of God. 

His life had gone in the right direction from there on, he was married to a beautiful wife and had a little son back in Wessex  
He was one of Alfred’s closest advisers, taught his youngest son Edward and ruled a small part of Wessex. He was truly happy even when he knew nobody from his family would understand his decision and he would never see them again. 

Tomorrow would-be Igor’s coronation and the King had asked him to accompany his Family to Kiev knowing that Ivar and him where in Kiev a long time ago.  
Ivar would be beaming if he could see Igor all grown up now, and Hvitserk knew that somewhere Ivar was watching and would probably beat the shit out of him if he hadn't agreed to the offer.

So, he had agreed to accompany the Family, anticipated to see Igor again and Hvitserk couldn’t lie to himself Katya and his child. Hell, he didn’t even know if Katya still lived in Kiev or if his child had survived his first year.

Riding into the city of Kiev was stunning, the same atmosphere as when he lived here all those years ago.  
People where cleaning the streets and hung garlands from windows to windows. A cheerful atmosphere hung in the air. 

Welcomed by a servant, the little group finally arrived at the castle and where guided directly into the throne room.  
They were greeted by a beaming and matured Igor, he had grown taller and muscular, Hvitserk noticed.  
“King Alfred, Elsewith, what a pleasure to welcome you in beautiful Kiev!”  
Igor exclaimed and roamed his eyes over his guests, his eyes stopped at Hvitserk, almost as if he didn't regionized him and just imagined something.

So, Hvitserk nodded a confirmative little nod at Igor and seconds later he was embraced in a big hug.  
“Hvitserk its so good to see you again it has been too long” Igor laughed happily.

He hugged him back and swallowed a lump in his throat. His thoughts wandered back to Ivar, he should be embraced by Igor now not him, was his own relationship with the prince not so close as his brothers relationship with Igor was.  
Hvitserk pushed it down and stepped slightly away from Igor to muster him.  
“You look great Igor. A real man!”  
“…and soon a king.” a voice brought him back from his admiring to the throne room they were in.

Katya, Hvitserk thought and a woman strolled into the room, not much younger than him.  
Her black long her was curled, a smile graced her face and her eyes twinkled promised that she was happy to see him again. 

“Hvitserk, you remember Katya?”  
“O-Of course, how could I forget, nice to see you Katya, you did not change a bit.” Hvitserk almost stumbled on his answer to Igor and smiled a heartful smile to the woman standing in the Door.

Before she could answer something, Igor turned back to Alfred, which he had almost forgotten about, and told a servant to bring them to their room.

Could I borrow Hvitserk for a moment King Alfred?” Katya asked and stopped the moving group ready to move into their chambers. 

“Of course, you both will have a lot to talk about.” a knowing smile tugged at Alfred lips, had Athelstan told him everything a long time ago, so he knew what that reunion was about.

The door closed with a soft thud and now Katya stood in front of him. "I knew that I would see you again Hvitserk, I even prayed to God for it" she layed her hands on his arms and then the door to the throne room opened and a small figure was lead into the room. 

"I think it's time that you meet someone Hvitserk, this is your daughter, Ida."


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hvitserk and Katya have to talk about some obstacles in their life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huhu,  
> Sorry that it took so long for me to upload this chapter.  
> But I had a lot going on, also I had the worst writer's block.  
> Hope you enjoy this chapter.
> 
> -Maria-

His daughter was the spitting image of him, Hvitserk noted as he starred down at the girl named Ida, her small hand wrapped up in her mother’s one.

Ida, a little girl with light brown hair, braided into two French braids, and green eyes returned his gaze curious and her teeth blitzed through as she smiled at him.

Something in Hvitserk snapped and he made on big step towards Katya and wrapped her in his Arms, a feeling of comfort washed over both of them.

“She waited a long time for you.” Katya voiced in his neck and her hands found his face, gently wiping away his tears, her own eyes overflowed with happy tears.   
“She’s so beautiful, our little girl” Hvitserk laughed and more tears rolled down his cheeks.

Hvitserk kneeled down and hugged his daughter firmly, careful not to press too hard, worried that he’d crush her.  
“It’s so good to meet you little one, I waited a long time to meet you.”  
Little arms wrapped hesitantly around his neck and Hvitserk could feel that Ida had buried her Head in his chest, she accepted him and relief washed over him.

The three people hadn’t noticed that Alfred was standing in the door ready to fetch them because Igor wanted to hear everything that had happened in the last six years.

Alfred was smiling when he saw the little Family happy reunited and knew better than to disturb this peaceful bonding moment between them.

But before he could silently sneak away, Katya saw him standing in the door.  
“King Alfred, were you searching for us?”  
“Indeed, but I didn’t want to disturb you, Igor wants us all in the dining hall, Lady.”

“Then let us go, don’t you think Ida?” Hvitserk was now standing with Ida on his left hand and looked expectant in the Round of people.

A small smile tugged at Katya’s lips and she layed a hand on his arm, “We’ll talk later, now let’s go eat.”

And so they left the throne room, Ida had her hand tugged safely in his big one, and got to the dining hall where a big meal was being served.

As he helped the struggling Ida with her meat he could sense Katya staring at him.  
He looked at her and could see in her gaze that she was surprised and maybe also a bit sad seeing him with their daughter.

They definitely had to talk later on, he reminded himself, and wanted to grab her hand under the table but didn’t.

Ida, completely oblivious to her parents inner struggles, munched her food happily and happily let her daddy fill her plate up again.

“If my son back home would be a big eater as you are my wife wouldn’t always be so worried.” Hvitserk laughingly said to Ida and suddenly the room, except the King and his wife, went silent.

“Your…Son” Katya said, a look of sadness crossed her face and she threw him a glance he couldn’t and maybe shouldn’t interpret.

“Yes, my son, Edmund, he’s three and my wife, Mildred.” He said to everyone his eyes never leaving Katya, studying her expressions.

“Is it true Hvitserk that your expecting another baby this summer?” Elsewith asked from behind her glass of wine, his old name leaving her lips naturally.

“Yes that’s true, Lady Elsewith…” he knew about her own escapades with his brother and was never really one to like the lady Elsewith, she just rubbed him wrong, but he supposed she already knew because, when he was close with Alfred, why couldn’t his wife be close to Alfred’s wife.

“Oh Hvitserk that’s wonderful, you and your family should come visit us when your child is there.” Snatching him out of his train of thoughts, Igor had stood up and hugged the expecting father.

“Yes Hvitserk, it would be lovely to meet your son and wife” Katya said from behind him and he could hear the silent jealous tone in her voice.  
Sighing inwardly Hvitserk set himself back onto his seat and wanted this to be over so they could talk in peace, just the two of them.

“It’s getting late. Tomorrow is a big day and we all should be well rested.” As if Alfred had heard his prayers he announced his retread to his chambers, not before throwing a telling look at Hvitserk and a sweet smile to Ida

It was late when he knocked at Katya's door and he felt himself transported back, to the night before their leave, but this time he wasn't greeted with passionate kisses but with ugly tears.

He should be used to see her in tears, since he had seen her cry very often, when he stayed in Kiev for the first time but every time it clenched his heart and he wanted to wrap her in his arms and protect her from the world outside.

"I'm sorry you had to find out this way."  
Hvitserk said silently, guilt nagging him since he knew they had been unresolved feelings on both sides.

"It's not that I am not happy for you, of course I am, but a little part of me hoped you would come back to us, even when I told you to go!" Katya sobbed, her face tear stained and her gaze sincere laced with guilt, she practically yelled the last words at him.

He didn't really know what to do, his wife rarely yelled and she only had a breakdown once when she was pregnant, so he was a bit hesitant towards yelling emotional women.

He got a halt on her arms, his eyes warm sparking a feeling of comfort, searched for her eyes and pulled her into a hug.

"You don't have to explain, I'm also sorry." Hvitserk shushed calming words into her ear, kissing her hair and forehead. 

This action calmed the princess down, face in Hvitserk's hands, he leaned down to kiss her.  
Expecting to feel his lips on her she was a little bit disappointed that he kissed her tears away and whisperd into her ear.  
"I love my wife, Katya and I don't plan to do something we both will regret tomorrow."  
Now, Katya smiled sad "I understand that it's just that, you know, seeing you with Ida made me sad and emotional about what could have been."

Sighing Hvitserk answered:" You know Ivar would have killed me if he knew about both of us and that his daughter is not his, again."  
The last part made both of them giggle and the atmosphere relaxed.

He kissed Katya on her forehead wispered against it: "I should go, tomorrow will be Igor's crowning and the day after will be long so we both should get some sleep."

Hvitserk was half out of the door when suddenly a female hand stopped him.  
"Stay...please"

He did.

**Author's Note:**

> If you liked it leave a positive comment or a kudos.  
> Remember english isn't my native language so forgive some tipos.  
> See you next time  
> Maria :)


End file.
